If Only You Knew Read online

  "Ric?" she said hardly recognizing the thick, throaty voice as her own.

  "Yes," he murmured.

  "Touch me."

  His laugh was short and choppy. "Honey, I am touching you. Can't you feel it?"

  She arched her back as he circled her breasts again, the tips of his fingers coming closer to the desired spot. Over and over he caressed her, coming near but never quite touching her where she yearned to be touched. Her lips parted and a single tear slid down her cheek as his hands both gave and denied her pleasure.

  He stopped when he saw her tear. "Don't cry," he said, then tenderly brushed his fingertips over the top of her nipples, drawing a harsh cry from her lips.

  Heat radiated from her breasts to the center of her body. As he gently touched her body, pleasure like she'd never known settled inside her, growing tighter and stronger with every stroke. She cried out as he teased her nipples, circling the brown orbs before drawing them between his thumb and forefinger. She moaned in frustration when he took away his hands.

  "It's okay. I'm not going anywhere." He shifted his weight to his knees, quickly removing his shirt, then moving his body until he lay down beside her. He cupped his hand under her breast then leaned forward. The feel of his mouth on her body sent blasts of heat between her legs. From a distance she heard herself sob, but there was nothing she could do to stop.

  "Do you like that, Anna May, or do you like this better?" He scraped his tongue over the tip of her nipple.

  She arched her back as desire washed over her.

  "Which do you like?"

  "Both."

  "Both it is," he murmured.

  The strange tension in her body magnified with every stroke of his tongue and every suckle he took from her breast. No man had ever touched her like this, giving her this kind of intense pleasure.

  "Ric ... Ric ... please."

  He eased his hand down her stomach underneath the towel until he reached the lace fabric. Moving his hand between her legs, he rotated his thumb back and forth. She moved her hips, questing and seeking relief from the unbearable tension inside her.

  She closed her eyes as spots of bright, intense light danced before her eyes. The tight coil of tension sprang free, sending her free falling into an intense, burning pleasure.

  Chapter 8

  Ric watched as Anna May slowly opened her eyes. His need burned like a raging fire, wild, powerful. It had taken nearly everything inside him not to rip off the lacy strips that barely covered her and bury himself inside her when she rocked her hips against his hand and cried out her release.

  He hadn't. Not then.

  As if she'd read his thoughts, she blushed and reached for the towel to cover herself.

  "No," he said softly. "Don't hide your beautiful body from me," he said as he covered her hand with his.

  "I ... I ..."

  He brushed his lips across hers in a soft-as-a-butter-fly kiss. "There's nothing to be embarrassed about. Passion is a natural part of life."

  "I know, but I didn't expect it."

  "You didn't? What did you expect?" he asked as he kissed her flushed cheek.

  "I don't know. I know you don't love me. I guess I didn't think I or you would enjoy this," she said, her voice trailing off in embarrassment.

  He raised his head and looked into her brown eyes. Did she really think he'd treat making love to her as a job? Something to do quickly and get it over with? Her sincere belief in the statement was unmistakable. Besides, he'd never known her to lie to him. He smiled. He'd have to prove to her just how wrong she was. His smile deepened and darkened with anticipation as he thought of hearing the sound of her release again.

  "So you thought you'd have to lie back and think of England? Anna May, we've barely begun to enjoy ourselves." He kissed her lips softly then stood beside the bed. His fingers quickly loosened the belt at his waist, and the soft music muffled the sound of his zipper. He took off his pants, removing his briefs with them.

  Her gasp aroused him further. Ahh, yes, he thought as he lay on the bed. He'd definitely make sure she enjoyed every minute of their time together. He gathered her in his arms, her soft breasts pressing against his chest, her hips pressing against his, separated by the silky bit of lace.

  "We never did get you out of this," Ric said in a thick tone. "I think it's about time we did." He sat up then slid the lacy creation down her hips and legs.

  He let his gaze feast on her lush breasts, slender waist, and full womanly hips.

  "I wish I had the words to tell you how beautiful you are," he said hoarsely. He reached out, taking her hand and placing her palm over his heart. "Maybe I can show you instead."

  He lay down on his side facing her. Leaning forward, he kissed her soft lips. He felt her put her arm around his shoulder. Her hand trembled as she rubbed his shoulders. He realized that she trembled from nerves, not from passion. Slowly, he opened his eyes, studying her tightly closed eyelids and quivering lips.

  "Anna May," he whispered.

  She opened her eyes.

  "Kiss me," he said rolling onto his back.

  She looked at him with wariness in her eyes. Finally, she leaned down and briefly placed her lips on his.

  "Not like that. Like this," he said placing his hand behind her head. He kissed her with all the gentleness he had inside him. Brushing his lips over hers in a soft, lazy motion until her tense shoulders relaxed against him and her soft breasts burned against his chest. Again and again he kissed her until her lips followed his. Until he couldn't tell if he was kissing her or she was kissing him.

  "Anna May," he said thickly. Waiting until her hot brown gaze met his he added, "Touch me."

  "Where?"

  "Anywhere you want, honey. Anywhere."

  She moved off his chest and lay on her side beside him. He wanted to tell her to come back, missing the warmth and fire of her body. She touched his face, gliding her finger down his cheek, then softly outlining his mouth. He parted his lips and used his tongue to taste her.

  Reaching up, he copied the same path across her cheeks and lips. He groaned in satisfaction when her tongue grazed the tips of his fingers. He traced her chin and jaw, sliding his fingertips down her neck to the base of her throat. Pausing, he felt the rapid beat of her pulse. He leaned forward and kissed her throat

  She trembled and he smiled in the darkness. Lying back on his pillow, he waited and watched her response. He didn't have long to wait. She followed the hard line of his jaw, caressing his neck, and kissed his throat. She kneaded his shoulder as she spread kisses along his collarbone. Down and down her soft lips traveled over the hard ridge of his chest, sending waves of delight down his body. She paused when she reached his nipple. He held his breath as she brushed her slightly parted lips over his nipple. He stiffened and groaned as she suckled him, her strokes were tentative and unsure, nonetheless they aroused him until he was almost beyond control.

  He brushed his hand through her hair, gently urging her to still her deliciously arousing mouth. "Stop, Anna May," he said taking ragged gasps of air.

  She stopped. Lifting her head, she looked at him. Her cheeks were flushed with passion and her brown eyes burned brightly with desire. "Don't you like it?"

  His laugh was rough and harsh. "Yes, honey. I like it a lot." He took her hand and closed it around his manhood. "I like it."

  Her gasp was a mixture of wonder and surprise.

  When he moved his hand, hers stayed curved around him. His jaw clenched as she hesitantly explored the length and width of him with her soft curious hand.

  Ric groaned and his muscles flexed.

  "Sorry," she said withdrawing her hand.

  "There's nothing to be sorry for," he said returning her hand to his flesh. When he was sure she wouldn't withdraw from him, he caressed her shoulder then rubbed the back of his fingers over her breast before traveling down the smooth, satiny slope of her torso and stomach. He smiled in pleasure as the muscles in her stomach trembled beneath his hand.<
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  He withstood her caress for as long as he could. Taking her hand away from his body, he sat up then lifted and settled her astride his hips, bringing their bodies as close as possible without entering her. Her eyes darkened as he lowered his head.

  He kissed her in wild hunger. Slipping his tongue between her lips, thrusting and retreating in a dance as old as man. Her groan sent a shudder of desire through him, which intensified as her arms wrapped around him. He ran his fingers through her hair. He ended the kiss with a moan when she rocked her hips in an unconscious invitation. He rocked his hips gently. Her breath broke, and her nails bit faintly on his back.

  "Ric," she moaned when he rocked his hips again. With her head back, she moved her hips. The harsh, short breath felt warm against his cheek. He slid his hand down her shoulder. Taking her hand, he guided her to his manhood.

  "Take me inside you," he said.

  Together they joined their bodies. She was tight, so very hot, he thought as he slowly eased inside her. He found the barrier of her innocence. Swearing inwardly, he pushed against the barrier.

  "Oh," she moaned.

  Sweat gathered on his brow as he pressed. The barrier held firmly in place. Slowly, he met her anxious gaze. With sorrow, he said, "Hold on to me." As her arms tightened around him, he wrapped his hands around her buttocks and rocked firmly against her.

  Her nails bit deeply into his skin, and he felt her barrier give way. He remained still inside her, wanting to thrust and move but afraid to cause her more pain. Gently he moved his hands up and down her back.

  "I'm sorry, honey," he said stroking her until he felt the tension in her body ease. "Are you all right?"

  "I ... I think so," she whispered.

  Leaning back, he said, "Look at me."

  She leaned back, moving ever so slightly.

  He sucked in his breath as her muscles tightened around him. "Are you sore? Does that hurt?" His voice was harsh with desire he held at bay.

  She tensed the muscles inside her again. "No. It doesn't hurt anymore."

  Closing his eyes in relief, he rocked slowly against her. "Okay?" he asked.

  "Okay," she said.

  He placed his hands on her hips and moved her forward as he rocked again. "Okay?"

  "Yes."

  Again and again their hips moved together and apart, building the tension inside him until he thought he would explode. But he didn't want to make the journey without her. He felt the change in her body as they continued to move. Her hands moved almost frantically on his back, her hips moved firmly and purposely over his, and the sweet sound of her delight rang in his ear.

  He moved harder searching for the rhythm that would give her the release they so desperately sought. Her hips thrust wildly against his, matching him thrust for thrust. He felt his control slipping away with every move. Fire burned inside him. "Anna May, Anna May," he chanted as his body moved closer to ecstasy. Then her arms tightened around him, and she screamed her release. What little control he had left shattered, and he tumbled over the edge into ecstasy.

  Somehow he'd found the strength to get them both under the covers. He lay on his side, holding Anna May in a spoonlike fashion. Anna May, his friend, his wife, his lover. The passion inside her surprised him. Never in his wildest dreams had he thought she'd want him. He would never forget the feel of her body moving over his or the sound of her passionate scream.

  She wanted him.

  But only for a little while. Only until she became pregnant with his child. He curved his arm around her waist, letting his hand spread over her flat stomach. Their child could be growing inside her now. Fierce pride and protectiveness flowed in his veins. His child. In the stillness of the night, he admitted to himself that he wanted her child almost as much as he wanted her.

  The pale morning sun peeked through the windows in Ric's bedroom. Anna May lay on her side, watching as the weak rays of sunshine lit up the room. She was well and truly married now, she thought. The weight of Ric's arm over her waist felt heavenly, and the feel of his hand resting over her stomach made her shiver.

  Last night had been a dream come true for her. She'd made love to Ric. The man she loved. She wasn't going to lie to herself. The love was all on her end. But he'd made her first experience with making love a memorable one. The pleasure, and even the pain, were all stored in the memory of her mind. She knew one day her memories would be all that she had left of tonight. Unless, she'd gotten pregnant. Hope sprang forth. Forget it Anna May. What are the odds of getting pregnant the first time ? Slim to none. But hope once kindled was hard to hold at bay. Gently she placed her hand over Ric's and closed her eyes, trying to imagine her stomach round with child. Instead, she saw herself holding a sturdy little boy about two years old, a perfect miniature of Ric. She smiled and held on to that image. As she drifted into sleep, she thought she heard the sound of a child calling for his mama.

  The sun was shining brightly when she awoke again. The familiar weight of Ric's arm was missing from her waist. Disappointed but slightly relieved, she slowly opened her eyes and looked directly into Ric's warm brown eyes.

  "Morning," he said in a husky voice.

  Heat rushed to her face, and her heart skipped a beat. "Morning," she whispered averting her gaze and pulling the covers up to her chin.

  He put his hand under her chin, raising it until she looked at him. "Don't be shy with me."

  "I can't help it, Ric. I've never done this before and it's embarrassing."

  "What's embarrassing?"

  "Ric! We're naked."

  He lifted the cover and looked under it. He pulled the cover over his chest and said in a shocked tone of voice, "Damn. You're right. How'd that happen?"

  "Ric," Anna May groaned.

  "Anna May, we're alone. Nobody cares if we're naked. Most people expect newlyweds to be naked the day after the wedding."

  "I know," she replied. "I guess I'll have to get used to it."

  "You plan on being naked a lot?" he asked with a straight face.

  She closed her eyes briefly as shyness warred with amusement.

  "Who would have thought Pastor Robinson's daughter likes being naked? Hummph, hummph, hummph."

  "Stop," she said putting her hands over her warm face.

  He smiled at her. "Don't worry. Your secret's safe with me."

  "I don't have a secret."

  He put his hand over his heart. "You mean everybody knows you like to be naked. Was I the last to know?"

  "You rat." She laughed.

  His smile faded. "Yeah, but you're not trying to hide under the covers anymore."

  "I know it's silly, but I've spent all my life being alone. Now I'm sleeping naked with a man. I've never slept naked in my life. It's going to be a major adjustment for me."

  "I know. If it helps, I'll wear pajamas to bed," he said.

  "Do you have a pair?"

  "No, but for you I'll go and buy a pair."

  "Thanks, but that's not necessary," she said. "I'll get used to it. Maybe one day I'll look back on this conversation and laugh."

  "Maybe. So how are you feeling? Are you sore?" he asked—gone was the playful tone, replaced with concern.

  "No, I feel fine," she said feeling embarrassed by their frank conversation.

  "Good. I didn't want to hurt you," he said softly as he touched her cheek.

  "You didn't," she murmured shyly, remembering the passion he'd given her.

  "Yes, I did at first."

  "But you didn't in the end," she replied. "You made me feel so good, so wanted."

  "I'm glad," he said softly then cleared his throat. "So you want first dibs on the bathroom?"

  She wanted to say yes but to do so would mean walking across the room totally naked. She wasn't ready for that. "No. You go ahead."

  "You sure? I promise to keep my eyes closed," he said.

  She was really tempted to take him up on the offer. "You promise?" she asked.

  "I promise," he replied.


  "Okay." She waited until she saw him close his eyes before she slid from under the covers.

  When she was in the middle of the room, he said, "Anna May, I didn't say when I'd close my eyes." She glanced over her shoulder. There lying with his hands behind his head, his eyes wide open, was her husband. She turned and ran the rest of the way to the bathroom.

  "That was a rotten thing to do, Ric," Anna May said when she walked into the bedroom wearing her robe.

  "No more rotten than the time you stole my clothes while I was swimming this summer," he replied.

  "How was I supposed to know you were in the buff? Nobody told you to go skinny dipping in the first place."

  "I own the lake. I can do what I want. And what I want right now," he said flipping back the covers, "is a hot shower."

  She caught her breath as he walked toward her naked as the day he was born. He had a beautiful body. Strong, hard, and completely male. When he reached her, he kissed her forehead.

  "Try not to stare the next time," he said then walked out of the room.

  She stared at the closed bathroom door then smiled. For a man who had to be talked into marrying her, he was treating her with the same teasing friendship he'd shown her in the past. Granted the topic of his teasing was more intimate, and at times embarrassing—nonetheless he'd still offered her his friendship.

  Anna May smiled and walked to the closet. Things were going to be okay, she thought. She wouldn't lose her best friend after all.

  Twenty minutes later Ric entered the kitchen. She smiled as he entered the room. "You want bacon or sausage?" she asked stirring the grits.

  "I'll have whatever you're having. Do you want any help?" he asked.